


Because I Adore You So

by Dzuljeta



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Dimension Travel, Eventual Fluff, Eventual Romance, F/M, Misunderstandings, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Telepathy, Teleportation, The Doctor's TARDIS Helps, Time Lord Rose Tyler, Time Travel
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-24
Updated: 2020-05-07
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:00:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23828743
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dzuljeta/pseuds/Dzuljeta
Summary: The Doctor, much to his delight, gets to see Rose's holographic projection every night for several minutes.Until one day, she's only there for thirty seconds.
Relationships: Tenth Doctor/Rose Tyler
Kudos: 26





	1. Chapter 1

**Because I Adore You So**

**1.**

Rose Tyler couldn't hide her bitter sadness from the Doctor this time. Usually, she knew how to mask it under her smiles and jokes.

“I’m sorry. I don’t think I’m going to come here any more, Doctor.”

“Why?”

“Because it hurts me to see you.”

“Why?” He could already feel his hearts breaking.

“Because it seems to me you’re perfectly content with whe situation we’re in right now. Have you ever even asked me how I feel?”

“What?”

“Exactly!”

“Well. I-”

“I love you and… I'm sorry,” Rose said honestly and was gone.

The Doctor was left staring into nothingness, feeling a lone tear rolling down his cheek.

 _Useless, am I?_ The Time Lord breathed, addressing the TARDIS.

_Yes. You should run after her._

The Doctor inhaled. "Are you making fun of me? I don't even know where she lives, let alone-” Oh.

_How many other Time Lords do you know?_

“I am the only one left.”

_What about Rose?_

“What do you mean?”

_Think again. Find her._

The Doctor inhaled, concentrating on trying to recall the tiny things he may have missed. Yes, Rose seemed a little more aloof than usual during her brief visits. It was as if she were expecting for something from him.

“I don’t understand! I have just lost my Rose, and I don’t even understand why she has left me…”

_Have you honestly been thinking these brief hello-goodbye meetings have been enough for her? With her hearts breaking anew every single time?_

The Doctor paled. Even now, he couldn’t be left alone with his sorrow, being forced to worry about his ship! Something must have happened to the old girl. _Hearts? Have you suddenly forgotten how to count, TARDIS?_

The clever vessel didn’t want to begin a pointless discussion with him.

The Doctor understood the old girl wasn't know to make such unjustified statements. "If what you're saying is true, it means- it means Rose needs me! Needs my help in dealing with-” The Time Lord was already imagining what seeing, what _touching_ her again was going to be like.

_Right now, it means nothing. I can get her here to you, but it's going to cost a lot to us both,_ the vessel warned him. _I may need to shut down a lot of my functions or ask you to do it, once she’s here. Would you be ready to take care of yourselves without me keeping an eye on you?_ The TARDIS was only talking about the Time Lord. 

The Doctor _'s_ ignorance was going to hit him hard, she imagined. _Do you at least have any idea where exactly Rose could be? Any kind of a landmark, or-_

“She's stuck inside Pete's World. The way between parallels is sealed. The only place she was able to contact me from has been the bloody Pete’s World Torchwood! But now, she won’t be coming to contact me any more!”

The vessel had been expecting this from her Time Lord. _Haven't you asked? Anything more specific than_ Pete’s World _should help!_

“She has told me she spends her evenings reading, trying to somehow find a way to come back.”

_Reading where?_

“How should I know?” He grunted. "Inside Torchwood? At home? And why are you using _words_ out of nowhere? I thought you preferred-”

_You fool._

The old girl sent him a disapproving sound, stopping all communication with her Time Lord whatsoever. All of a sudden, bringing Rose Tyler and her joy of life aboard felt like the best idea there could ever be, even if it meant her stopping some of her everyday functions, if only to refill her soon-to-be emptied power resources. She imagined Rose was eventually going to forgive her.

  
  


Rose Tyler has materialised in the room, just like the old girl has intended, allowing herself to dim the lights on board right away. Stunned and amazed, the companion peered at the Doctor, equally mesmerised… and pulled him into a passionate snog right away.

Not allowing him to relax, she pulled away and slapped him, the gesture supposed to take some of her unwelcome disillusionment away. It didn't work.

“Rose.” He found his tongue at last. _“_ I swear, you feel a lot like your mother.”

She rolled her eyes at him.

“Whatever’s got into you?! Employing your ship for transporting me here?” _Forcibly, if I may add!_

“She insisted!”

“I’m sure she did, without you doing anything to try and reach for me by yourself, Doctor.”

"But- but… I can finally hold your hand now, 

Rose! You're not an illusion any more!”

“Tough! I’m sure you’d have preferred having my visits happening every day, without you ever needing to think twice. How often have you been thinking about how much work it may be taking from me to keep these meetings possible?

Allow me to answer for you. Never. Because you have taken my visits as a treat, as a pleasant distraction in your everyday life.”

“That’s not it!”

“No? Have you ever asked me how I was coping? It was all just ‘I’m so happy to see you! Oh… Must you leave already?’ While actually, I was feeling so abandoned, so alone! With your toothy grins which never meant anything only hurting me more and more every time!”

The Doctor was worried. “I wasn’t aiming for such an effect! I thought my smiles were making you happy!”

“Often, it felt as if you were eager for me to leave.”

“Because I thought you were going to come the following day anyway!”

"How little it takes you to get used to comfort," she breathed, disillusioned. "I bet you didn't once try to find me."

The Doctor wrapped his arms around her. _You can't know that! I have been looking for you every second of my life, ever since you were gone, Rose!_

She blinked. "You know.”

" _You_ have been the one pulling me into a kiss," he chuckled. "The things it has shown me has been the best explanation."

Rose glared at him. “You didn't point out any difference in me whenever we were talking. Not once. Knowing of your self-proclaimed superiority in everything-”

The Doctor sighed, feeling defeated. "Fine. The old girl has helped me.” 

She gulped. The tension aboard felt suffocating. This hasn't been anywhere close to the blissful reunion her mind had been portraying. 

"The question still remains, even if it's no longer possible. Would you rather I left and continued to appear to you daily for several minutes?"

He shuddered, panicked. “No!”

Rose sighed at him meaningfully.


	2. Chapter 2

**Previously…**

_ ”The question still remains, even if it’s no longer possible. Would you rather I left and continued to appear to you daily for several minutes?” _

_ He shuddered, panicked. “No!” _

_ Rose sighed at him meaningfully. _

**Because I Adore You So**

**2.**

“This is nice to know.”

The Doctor blinked at her. “Rose, I'm sorry. I may have been mesmerised by merely getting to see you again-”

"And again, and again-”

"And again, and again," he echoed. “But it's gone now. We are here, together!”

Rose inhaled. “I wish I could trust your reasoning just like I used to, Doctor. I wish we could at least be a couple of travelling friends, like before.”

The alien bit his lip, concerned. “We can be! The Doctor and Rose, inside the TARDIS!”

His excitement was washed away by seeing the sad look in Rose’s eyes. “Can’t we?”

“Not any more. I used to take your every word for granted, knowing you were never going to hurt me on intention… or to leave me behind.”

“I’m not going to! Now that we’re together again, I- The Norway thing, it has never been my intention!”

“Lies. Nothing but lies. You didn’t even try to reach for me, ever!”

"But-”

“Doctor. Nothing has changed on my part. You know that. It never will. But I hate being lied to.  _ Especially by someone I love. _

The colour on his face changed several times.

"Rose. Allow me to prove to you-”

"Don't. I'm staying here with you, either way.”

“Could I at least get a smile from you, Rose?”

She grinned at him. "There. Happy?”

“Are  _ you  _ happy, Rose?”

“I am always happy,” she sighed. “According to the general opinion.”

“However?”

“You are the only person I trust in this world, with Mum and everyone else happy inside Pete’s World,” Rose said. "I haven't been happy there, not for one moment.”

The Doctor exhaled. “I think you should know, Rose… Ever since your visits have begun, I- I have rediscovered my reason for living. I no longer needed anyone, only you.”

Rose was puzzled. “What do you mean?”

“I have finally dared to travel on my own. Knowing you would come to enlighten my evenings… my nights. I believed seeing your face again has been the very last thing I deserved, Rose, I-”

The girl was gaping at him, her eyes filled with love, admiration, regret and… pity.

“I have been counting seconds until I got to see your yearned-for face again. Not only that, I have been finding reasons to abandon whatever, refusing to talk to whoever, I-”

“You have let go of your companions,” Rose inhaled. "But why? We both know you need someone to keep an eye on you, someone to stop you from starting an apocalypse,” she chuckled bitterly.

“You are my everything, Rose. With you here, I need no-one else,” he admitted. “If you ever choose to leave me, I'll die.”

His raw honesty was almost terrifying. Rose blinked at him, concerned. 

“You need me by your side forever. But we aren't bound with any unbreakable promises yet.”

The Time Lord gulped, his face darkening. “We’re not. You’re right.”

Rose inhaled, understanding she didn’t want to see the Doctor gloomy, ever. Not because of her.

She took him by the hand. “Do you want us to be?”

“Yes.  _ More than anything in this world. _

Rose beamed at him. “So do something about it.”

The Doctor smiled at her. “Anything you’d like in particular?”

“Kind words. Love confessions. Hugs. Kisses. I’m a simple person,” Rose giggled.

“To me, you’re not. You have never been. You have changed my life, Rose.”

“For the better, I hope?” She smiled.

“Yes! Am I forgiven?”

The girl blinked at him, feigning ignorance. “What for?”

“For failing to see you have become a Time Lady. For never telling you how much you mean to me.”

“How much I mean to you a a human or as someone of your kind?” Rose asked, her intended teasing lost along the way.

The Doctor sent her a searching look. “I have loved you ever since the Autons tried to take over the world. I have never stopped. Won't ever. Don't you dare think otherwise, Rose!”

“What about all the women you have kissed when I have already been travelling with you? What have they been? Distractions?”

“You've been in a relationship at that time.”

Rose bit her lip. “Had you asked, I'd have dumped him in a heartbeat,” she blew out a breath.

The Doctor inhaled. “How many times would I have needed to ask? Twice? Thrice? Seven times?”

“Just once.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes!”

The Time Lord beamed at her. “What would Mickey have thought of you? What about Jackie?”

“I'm sure you'd have thought of something, Doctor.”

He exhaled. “I'd have taken you somewhere far away, I think.”

Rose giggled bitterly. “You had, for a year, remember?”

The Doctor looked at her knowingly. “Ah. Mickey Smith finally getting a fair reason to dislike me afterwards,” he shrugged.

“Don't forget Mum!”

“I could never forget her,” the alien assured Rose.

“Who could?” The girl asked him sadly. “Mum has been the only good thing worth remembering the bloody Pete's World for. I just can't bear to think she's gone forever!” 

The Doctor pulled her into a hug. “Who knows what could happen? You have proven to me contacting someone from a parallel universe has been possible, daily! You must know I have been trying to convince myself seeing you again has been a lost cause. I'm sorry, so sorry, Rose!

Now that I think of it… The things which could have been done, had I been trying harder! And then, there were you, finding a way to contact me, when employing only some awfully limited Torchwood resources! My brilliant, brilliant Rose!”

"Thanks for the compliment. You should try saying those more often,” she giggled.

“Only to you, I imagine?”

"Unless you want to be reminded what Tyler fury feels like, I'd like being the one receiving compliments, thank you very much!”


End file.
